The Evil Enemy of Morning Me

Mike asked me the other night if I’d ever seen the Seinfeld episode where he talks about the “Night You” and the “Morning You.” I never had, but apparently he explained how the Night You is the Morning You’s enemy, and there is no way that poor Morning You can ever get back at Night You. Well, that struck me as one of the most accurate things I’d heard in some time. Case in point – these pictures of Goldie: Night Goldie is staying up late, happy and loving life – and look at all that does for Morning Goldie!

What’s worse is that Night Me is also an enemy to Middle-Of-The-Night Me (which I never knew existed since that Me was sleeping until I had children). Seriously, I am so miserably tired in the morning. I can only manage to get out of bed by assuring myself I will go to bed by 10:00 that night. Unfortunately by that time Night Me has rolled into town and she’s happily going about her sabotage of Morning Me. “Let’s stay up and watch this movie, Mike,” Night Me will say. “Perhaps I’ll just check a few more emails . . . oh, and this one certainly deserves a lengthy reply.” A few moments later Night me might suggest, “hey, you haven’t looked at your old photo albums for awhile, and what about your journal from when you and Mike were dating? . . . Oh no, you never wrote about your actual wedding day! Now would be the ideal time . . . just as soon as you and Mike look up coyotes on the internet to find out if they would ever attack you if they were in a group . . . but first, find out if they hunt in groups.” There is no no way Morning Me will ever get even.