And one time I fell on the school playground and when I wiped off my hands I thought there was a flat metal disc stuck on one palm, but it was a thumb tack! It was pushed all the way into my hand!
But maybe worst of all is that I once sewed through my fingernail. That's right. The needle broke right off in my index finger nail and stopped the sewing machine in its tracks. I was sewing -- maybe like how Cruella Deville drives -- all crazy and fast. I don't know why. It was some really thick and long bumper pads. I was trying to sew lines right through the padding which I maybe shouldn't have been doing. I thought if I pushed the pedal 100 miles per hour and pushed it through very forcefully it would be a good plan. Well, yah, a good plan for sewing through your finger! Shudder.
Another time I was grabbing one piece of gum after another to stick on to blobs of hot glue (for some "running for office" handouts of one of my siblings) and at one point I grabbed my own finger and stuck it on a strip of gum-awaiting hot glue. Hot glue is just what it claims to be. Hot.
But, I've never broken a bone or been taken to the hospital horribly ill (only maybe horribly anaphylactic from those darned Brazil nuts).
It's just my hands are all crazy and they look like I've been holding hands with Edward Scissor Hands because they have become so cracked and crazy thanks to eczema, and I was remembering today how Mike once told me when we were dating that my hands were one of his favorite features about me. How sad. And now I have some old country song going through my head that goes, "These hands are the hands of a . . ." and that is all I can remember over and over. As we all know, one song line going through your head over and over is quite maddening. And all thanks to that cursed Bedazzler.Anyway, off to bathe old purple mouth. Peace out.