Saturday, October 31, 2009

Dog Carts

If you wonder why this lovely face, it is because of my husband. Actually, I think this is a picture Goldie took, but it is the very face I'm sure I was making when my husband mentioned how a dog backpack is one thing, but even better would be a dog cart.

And no, I wouldn't need to worry about our kids falling out of the dog cart (because that was ONE of my issues with a dog cart). It wouldn't be for them to ride in. It would be to cart their wares – the wares they would be selling – that would be pulled by their dog and his cart (that last sentence was a chiasm for you literary geniuses).

He's a big dog, so I guess he would need to pull big things like watermelons or giant Hubbards maybe.

Mike saw a little cart as well. Perfect, he thought, for a dog pulled spice cart. I think I was making that same face as above while I envisioned our kids going around the neighborhood shouting, “Spices! Spices for sale! Get your Cumin! Get your Cloves! Spices for sale!”

Of course, anyone can see that Thor is just too much of a dog for spices. It just isn't a good match. Maybe Mike's sister's dog Nacho could get away with pulling a spice cart. He seems small and . . . spicy?
Hmm. Maybe too spicy. (Nacho? Are you in there?? Thor! Did you eat Nacho? Bad dog! Open your mouth!!)Anyway, it's a good thing I love my husband so ridiculously because one of these days I will be found curled in a small ball – shivering – eyes glazed but twitching occasionally. I won't be able to respond to any questions. I won't really say anything at all. Only, occasionally, I might mutter something like, “spice cart,” or “pack goats,” or “beehives,” or “chickens,” or “apple press,” maybe even, “sheep herding.” And that will be the end of the Nancy we all once knew and loved.

Ah well, at least Mike will be able to love me all the more. He can put a little shirt on me that says, “My Little Nut Case,” or, he can wear one that says, “I'm with Crazy,” and take me along to his dog cart conventions.

If only I'd seen the warning signs when we were dating. They tell you to talk about finances, religion, kids, etc., but they always forget to mention the ever so important, “inclination towards homesteading.”

Oh, who am I trying to kid. Even if I had known, I still would have married him with out batting an I (wait, I might have batted an “I” – I'm not sure . . . I meant to say without batting an EYE), and he knows it. Darn him.


London said...

Oh Nancy! Everything in that post made me laugh! I could so picture you curled up in a ball as you described and people walking by shaking their heads, "Poor girl".

Perla said...

you always make me laugh, sister. though when i first started reading i was hoping this was going to be about dogs whose back legs don't work so they have to have their rump up on a little cart. you know what i'm talking about?

Tia Juana said...

I keep forgetting that you named your dog after us.....

And, he is really big.

And, I'm surprised, actually, with Mike's homesteading tendencies, that you only have one dog. I think you need a little dog like Nacho to keep Thor company for reals. Looking at that picture of Thor and Nach makes me wonder if you had to babysit that little chiwawa whilst they ventured to Mexico... if so, you are really nice. Nicer than this aunt.

Have a nice day - you little nut case.

Marnie said...

I don't know, Nanc. I am quite sure I would buy just about anything sold by kids peddling their wares from a dog cart. You might be on to something. I bet it would pay for itself in days. And when the school requires, you could send them out with Happenings Books, wrapping paper samples, etc.

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