Monday, August 29, 2016

St. Simon’s Island 2016

Photo Aug 14, 8 26 32 AM

I still haven’t loaded all the vacation pictures from my camera onto our computer. The sorting through and editing is too daunting of a task to consider, but, for now, there is certainly no shortage of photos from my cell phone or from the few I pulled from my camera over to my phone (thanks to my camera’s handy wifi ability – bless its heart!). And, for those of you who don’t know about these sorts of things, from my phone I can easily share photos wherever I need. Of course, someday my kids will read this and think it is funny that I couldn’t just share them straight from my camera. Or, probably, straight from my mind via some small inserted brain chip.

Anyway, I once wrote about my secret for keeping up on blogging and journaling. The secret was simply this: I don’t stay caught up. (Shh. It is kind of a secret and I’m a little shy about it.) If I miss birthdays or holidays, trips or experiences, I just . . . move along and write about whatever suits my fancy from where I am at. I miss a lot of significant things that way, but . . . I also avoid getting so bogged down by everything I am inevitably behind on that I stop writing altogether. Which means . . . I still capture a “good enough” sprinkling of life around here.

At least that’s usually the way I function. But lately I find my blogging becoming more and more infrequent – partly because it really has been such a wild summer – but also because I can’t quite let go of things I know I want to record! My little secret has been failing me, and the list keeps adding up – making me feel frozen by it all!

So . . .  let’s at least get a brief bit of this huge and totally unexpected “three weeks in St. Simon’s” part of summer down. And then I will try to not worry about finding words for my dad until they come, and I’ll let school starting (in a bit of chaos – the very morning after Mike and the kids got back from GA), and flooded basements, and defrosted freezers, and summer birthdays just . . . drift happily off (though they are welcome to come floating back into my mind – asking to be written – at some later point if they care to enough).

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Last week at this time part of our family was still traveling across the country – trying to get back home. And only the week before that? We were at the ocean (again) and Anders was being stung by a jellyfish. At least we assumed. Are there other . . . stinging creatures hanging about in the ocean? Other beachgoers seemed to think that was the culprit anyway. And, while it conjures up images of large, pink, blobby terrors swishing by – reaching out their terrifying tentacles (tentacles? is that what they have?) in stinging rage -- it probably wasn’t quite as impressive as all that. (We’d caught a few in our nets while crabbing: small, clear, pitiful looking things.) But, there was still a lot of screaming and apparent pain, and Anders waving his arm around wailing about being stung; as well as a fair amount of short-lived water paranoia from the other kids, and a lot of me googling things about the toxicity and danger of jellyfish around the St. Simon’s area, etc. And then, . . . Anders found a nice little hermit crab and became enough occupied with his friendship (and with gifting him the family of about twenty other hermit crabs discovered by Penny) that everything seemed to calm down and gravitate back to happy. (Aided by our stop on the way home at an over-priced little ice-cream shop to buy “Cookie Monster” ice-cream for everyone.)

Photo Aug 16, 2 34 14 PMPhoto Aug 16, 8 05 51 AMPhoto Aug 17, 11 01 33 PM

That little experience could be a metaphor for our whole trip. Ocean. Calm, low-tide water. Noticing the wonder of fish leaping out just feet from us. And then . . . a jellyfish sting. Oh OK. A poor and rather unnecessary metaphor. But, as I went about sharing lovely little highlight images from our vacation on Facebook and Instagram, they garnered a tidy pile of comments about bliss and magic and joy. And it did have all those moments!

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There were bikes in the shed at our vacation rental. We used them to ferry babies to the beach, and we took turns riding about the island. (One night I went on a long ride with just the two babies in the bike cart and had to repeatedly remind myself that my emotions surrounding coastal GA and it’s beauty were more of an intense crush really, and that I didn’t truly want to cast aside the steady, dependable, long-term love relationship I have with UT – it’s mountains and seasons and LIGHT air – in favor of a permanent move to this exotic and exciting new beauty). We waded in the low-tide waters – discovering hermit crabs and trying to catch tiny fish. We leapt over and into the big waves of high-tide. We wandered through all the little pier shops and spent many evenings walking out on the pier – seeing what interesting things people were catching. We even tossed our own crabbing nets over the pier’s side and watched the kids eagerly pull them up to exclaim over our finds. We walked along thickly wooded trails – trees all dripping with the Spanish moss that I love so much. We wandered about the historic Jekyll Island yacht club area; read tombstones at the old Christ Church cemetery; stopped by Horton house (where Mike and I took pictures of just the two of us eleven years ago); and made our way to Fort Frederica and other historical landmarks. We visited big waterslides; discovered hidden parks and chanced upon unexpected, magical, miniature villages.

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Goodness. The oldest three even got to go with Mike on a private shark and ray fishing expedition! They caught multiple sharks and rays (including a four-foot shark [good job Goldie]). They also trailed a shrimp boat surrounded by dolphins. By waving fish bait in the water with their hands, they got dolphins to come right up to their boat to stick their curious heads out. Another dolphin leapt out of the water so high and close that they were all doused with salt water.

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But the limitations and added work and difficulty of having many small children has maybe never been more apparent to me than during this summer of trips and detours from our daily routines and duties. Along with all the highs, I’ve probably cried and felt the lows more keenly than at any other time in this past year. And all those comments over our dreamy adventure occasionally caused me to fret that I was painting some false and enviable reality for my friends and family. One that only showed the highlights of days that were also filled with ordinary, tiresome tasks and frustrations and troubles. And, it’s true. That’s what these pictures were. And yet . . . even a week back at home and already they seem to be all that really mattered. The three-day drive, and times being limited all day in what I could do with the kids while Mike was at his work trainings, and frustrations over kids tantruming as we tried to have adventures, or babies crying or crawling into the ocean every time we went to the beach (when I would have so loved to just . . . sit for a moment) seem . . . insignificant. And, these pictures – these highlights – DO seem like the the whole truth. Like having been able to sift out the unimportant and trifling bits of dross so I could more clearly see beautiful reality.

Photo Aug 13, 1 19 01 PMPhoto Aug 14, 4 28 29 AMPhoto Aug 14, 4 53 43 AMPhoto Aug 14, 4 56 28 AMPhoto Aug 14, 4 58 10 AMPhoto Aug 19, 3 09 56 PMPhoto Aug 16, 8 46 08 AMPhoto Aug 15, 3 59 54 PM

4 comments:

Marilyn said...

Yes yes yes. I guess it's the sharing of these things that causes the worry? Because I don't think I usually worry about ME, myself, being too positive or skipping over the bad parts. I KNOW that's a good thing to do, in my own mind. But I worry that OTHER people, not having experienced the bad/mundane parts, will get the wrong idea. But then, they would get even MORE the wrong idea if I acted like the bad times were too prevalent---and that seems even worse, talking about how hard and tired I was while in Rome or whatever (poor baby!).

Well, anyway, I think what you said is exactly right. When it's all over, the good IS all that matters. And the good you take from the bad (like, telling the kids later about their tantrums as a funny story--when at the time they weren't funny at all). I love how you said it's sifting out the dross so you can see the REALITY better. Love that.

(But, oh, how I want to JUST SIT sometimes instead of constantly having to chase after babies (EVEN good babies, which they often aren't). Yes. In church. At the park. At the swimming pool. At the beach. It's just so hard, isn't it?)

Lovely, lovely pictures. Full of joy. Don't ever feel bad for showing that, as it makes ME happy too! :)

Nancy said...

Yes! It's the sharing that causes me to worry! I feel perfectly right and good and more full of gratitude and joy when I can notice a happy moment with kids or a bit of sparkle or excitement amidst the ordinary or even hard. But then the flood of comments about how perfect it all was suddenly made me fret I was giving some false image that others might feel depressed about. I mean I admit to feeling that occasionally in seeing highlights of other lives. I was chatting with one of my cute former YW about it (she's now in her early 20s). She was cute and said how we can't possibly control what others might think or feel and that there are more options than "Oh dear. Someone might think life is perfect and feel bad." She said that for her seeing these glimpses inspires her on her journey towards creating a family. (Which was very flattering of course.) But it did make me feel that, while certainly we should acknowledge the struggle and not purposely try to create enviable nonsense, it is good to share bright and joy! (I hope. Hahah!)

Val said...

Hi there Nancy!
Reading your beautiful blog, strangely enough, this is what came to my mind:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OEkJ45ZXK-o
This old actor (occasionally singer) says at some point (2:07) that in life, we don't remember well all the sad/bad/worldly stuuf, but we what we do remember is only love and tenderness. The true essence of your experience! :)

Nancy said...

Oh! I love that Val! I wish so much that I spoke French so I could understand it exactly as it says! But yes! I read a quote from the author CS Lewis the other day that said something about heaven working backwards to transform even our agonies into glory so that someday we will be able to look back and say "I've never lived anywhere but heaven". :)

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