Friday, February 5, 2016

A Mouse, Summer, and the Temple

This morning, as I sat at the foot of my bed, feeding Mette and calling to various children to find their shoes and come get their hair done, a mouse dashed into my bedroom doorway. A mouse! He paused, whipping his head about frantically as if unsure where best to run; but his panic, however great it might have been – out in broad daylight in a house with a dog and people and no clear shelter nearby -- can have been no greater than my own! I felt so helpless: reduced to a state of frozen terror by a mammal no longer than my pinky finger! I don’t know that it was fear over what the mouse itself might do so much as fear because . . . what on earth was I to do?? What? I ask you! It wasn’t as if I could expect to pounce and actually catch it (pouncing is for cats, and Tigger; . . . and heaven forbid that my hands should touch it). And it wasn’t like a spider that might wait while I grabbed a jar. I found myself actually relieved when it scurried off towards the front room. Relieved, dear friends, that a mouse was in my house, but out of my field of sight. But really. It was a very up in the air sort of feeling. I was not keen on it at all. And now? I guess I just ask Mike to set some traps. (And not tell dear Goldie. She would not approve. Bless her.)

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Summer is just so fun right now. I really do love the learning how to talk phase so much. While the older kids are in school, she spends a good portion of her time yelling for, or at, Anders. If it isn’t “Annnnnders! Where are you?” It’s, instead, “ANDERS!” in a tone of much frustration or anger (even though what Anders may have done wrong in those situations is hard for me to ever place).

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A few weeks ago was the first time she “told” on one of her siblings. She ran into my room and in much agitation shouted, “JESSE! Mmblblmm Jesse!!”

“What’s the matter?” I asked. “Did Jesse make you mad?” I walked with her to the living room and said, “Jesse, how come Summer is so mad at you?”

“Oh,” he said. Shrugging. “Because I wouldn’t give her anymore of my crackers.”

It just made me laugh that it now occurred to this little human to go and tattle if a sibling wasn’t doing what she thought they should be.

Also, I heard her small voice coming from the front room recently repeating, “Need help. Need help.” I came and saw this. I suppose I shouldn’t have made her wait in her terrifying predicament for me to get me camera (first picture below), but . . .

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I went to the temple last night for the first time since Mette’s August arrival. It’s so freeing, after a new baby’s arrival, once I feel I can leave on occasion and know that others can get them to bed fine and the like. I would be untruthful if I said that every time I go to the temple I have some profound spiritual experience. Or even if I said, “most times”. And yet . . . always always, during or after, there is an increase in peace and perspective. And something must happen – even if it isn’t always fireworks and sudden insight – because I crave being there. My spirit seems to recognize more than my mortal self can, that things can be felt there and layers of veil can be lifted slightly because I long to go back right after I leave. And always . . . so many thoughts, so many wonderings, so many “Was that coincidence? Or a bigger hand involved?”

Photo Feb 04, 9 38 05 PM (1)Photo Feb 04, 9 38 12 PM

Here is what I posted after attending last night:

Little, lone me stepped out of this place at 9:37 tonight and walked, with quick and shivering steps, to my empty, cold car. But I felt like, small as I was in this very big and dark world, I carried a tiny glowing speck of light with me. And in me. And, black as this night was, It seemed I could see a web weaved with the unmistakable dots of light from all of you connected to my life in any way. Thank you. Thank you for all those lights.

Photo Feb 03, 5 14 57 PM (1)Photo Feb 03, 5 14 24 PM

Anywho, that’s all for now!

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4 comments:

Trisha said...

Oh my goodness that Summer would be yelling Need Help. That made me giggle cause she's SO close the ground. Cute.

And yes- that smell speck of light inside you that you just want to grab onto and keep that spirit with you when are back home. It's so important and feels so light and miraculous

Kara said...

The piano bench shot---HAHAHA. Aren't we like that sometimes?

And the temple thoughts. I concur about the longing. We live 8 hrs from ours and haven't been since before I got pregnant with this last. The longing is intense.

Nancy said...

Haha Kara! I thought that same thing about the piano bench -- I probably look just the same to Heavenly Father most the time!

And wishing a closer temple built your way soon. For years I was terrible about going. The usual reasons -- too many babies, no baby sitter, etc. Finally about two years ago I quit my excuses and started going regularly and now I feel so sad when I can't go for long. I feel guilty I was such a slacker when I've always had one close!

Marilyn said...

I saw a mouse once in our old house. It was while I was nursing in the middle of the night and it FREAKED ME OUT. It is strange. I just felt like there was a stranger in the house and I was, I don't know, helpless. I hated to think of killing it (I'm with Goldie) but I also hated to think of it BEING there...watching me. Eeeek! I think Sam did eventually get a trap for it, but I told him I didn't want to know anything more about it, and I didn't.

I love that picture of Mette swathed in some sort of Moroccan garb :)

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