October’s End

October certainly just comes to a sudden halt, doesn’t it! One day it’s fall and pumpkins and Halloween. The next day . . . it’s Christmas.

Haha. No. Not really. It’s certainly not Christmas here yet. (Though I did listen to this song today . . . a few times. It’s Cristmassy, but not . . . a traditional Christmas song . . . so it felt OK. And it’s so pretty. But don’t tell Goldie! She is not one to allow nonsense like sneaking in early Christmas music.)

But the change from fall and Halloween to . . . not fall and Halloween did feel rather abrupt this year! Last weekend our trees were still mostly covered in fall leaves. And the weather was fairly warm. And half of my kids still had no idea what costume they’d wear. But today I woke up to used costumes – all piled up and ready to be returned to the basement, cold rain, and only a few clinging leaves!

October finished. Just like that! (The calendar even changed to November!)

I really do love the month of October. Everything fall and harvesty just feels wholesome and makes me happy. (Well, minus the creepy costumes and gore. But those don’t actually factor in to our October around here.) Leaves, cooler weather, school routines having become . . . well, routine, pumpkins and cornstalks, our fall-scented candle occasionally burning, eager kids digging through our costume boxes, the anticipation of the whole holiday season ahead.

In the midst of it I often almost begin to think I could choose it as my favorite month. (After all Christmas has all that pesky shopping for one million kids to take care of. . . .)

But then I remember Christmas music! And the whole focus on Christ’s birth, and childhood memories of my grandma’s on Christmas Eve and of sleeping in my older sister Amy’s room in the new Christmas nightgowns my mom had sewn – listening to Amy tell stories about Santa sightings, and the magic my mom somehow wove into snow and Christmas books, and twinkly lights everywhere, and my kids so excited, . . . and Christmas music! (Ha! I know. I said that. But Christmas music is so tied up with everything I mentioned; with every nostalgic and good thing in my life and every good thing that Christ has given me that . . . I can pretty much sum up all the magic of December with: “Christmas music”. A million memories and emotions and smells and sights tied with so many songs!).

But this is and was a happy month. I’m noticing more and more the things that have become tradition for my kids. There are a million things that I don’t do . . . that others do so expertly that occasionally I fret for a moment I am robbing my kids. But I really have begun to see the things that they expect and look forward to each year – the things that have become ours. (Even small things like Abe lighting all the pumpkins on the porch and all the candles in the house for me on Halloween, or the older girls taking the little ones trick-or-treating around our cul-de-sac before going off to their own parties, or eating stew on Halloween.) I keep seeing these things – the ones that have become repeated and significant to my kids – and they make me feel like I am managing to create a magical childhood in my own way for them – just like my parents did for me.

All the traditions are tied, at this stage, with a lot of work and a fair amount of stress for me. I long to perfectly create these holidays for my kids with no one demanding to be held and with mess never the end result. (I can’t even tell you how long it took to clean up everything from pumpkin carving . . . and how hard that felt to me with it landing when five little people desperately needed help getting to bed and Mike was away). But mixed in with the challenge of pulling it off, the perfect moments all do exist. I recognize them. And I love them!

(And one last October-ending note: Abe’s mountain-biking team just had their team pics taken. They made a big to-do over the outgoing seniors – presenting them with a cool poster with all their pictures on it, etc. We will miss it!)